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第68章

time enough for love-时间足够你爱(英文版)-第68章


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  〃Mutant Howards; Lazarus?〃
  
  The old man shrugged。 〃Isn't that a question…begging term; dear? If you use a long enough time scale; every one of the thousands of genes a flesh…and…blood carries is a mutation。 But by the Trustees' rules; a person not derived from the Families' genealogies can be registered as a newly discovered Howard if he can show proof of four grandparents surviving a? least to one hundred。 And that rule would have excluded me; had I not been born into the Families。 But on top of that; the age I had reached when I got my first rejuvenation is too great to be accounted for by the Howard breeding experiment。 They claim today that they have located in the twelfth chromosome pair a gene plex that determines longevity like winding a clock。 If so; who wound my clock? Gilgamesh? 'Mutation' is never an explanation; it is simply a name for an observed fact。
  
  〃Perhaps some natural long…lifer; not necessarily a Howard; had visited Blessed…the naturals are forever moving around; changing their names; dyeing their hair; they have all gone through history…and earlier。 But; Minerva; you recall from my life as a slave on Blessed one odd and unsavory incident…〃
  
  (Omitted)
  
  〃…so my best guess is that Llita and Joe were my own greatgreat…grandchildren。〃
  
  VARIATIONS ON A ThEME
  
  x
  
  Possibilities
  
  〃Lazarus~。 was that why you refused to share 'Eros' with her?〃
  
  〃Eh? But; Minerva; dear; I didn't reach that conclusion…or suspicion…that night。 Oh; I admit to prejudice about sex with my descendants…you can take the boy out of the Bible Belt; but it is hard to take the Bible Belt out of the boy。 Still; I had had a thousand years in which to learn better。〃
  
  〃So?〃 said the puter。 〃Was it simply that you still classed her as an ephemeral? That troubles me; Lazarus。 In my own…deprived…state; I find that; like her husband Joe; I see her side of it。 Your reasons seem excuses; not sufficient
  
  grounds to refuse her need。〃
  
  〃Minerva; I did not say I refused her。〃
  
  〃Oh! Then I infer that you granted her this boon。 I feel a lessening of tension。〃
  
  〃I didn't say that; either。〃
  
  〃I find an implied contradiction; Lazarus。〃
  
  〃Simply because there are things I have not said; dear。 Everything I tell you winds up in my memoirs; that was the deal I made with Ira。 Or I can tell you to erase something; in which case I might as well not have told you at all。 Perhaps my twenty…three centuries do hold something worth recording。 But I see no possible excuse for placing on record each time some darling lady shared with me simply for pleasure; not for progeny。〃
  
  The puter answered thoughtfully; 〃I imply from this addendum that; while I am precluded from inferring anything about the boon Llita requested; your rule with respect to ephemerals extended only to marriage and to progeny。〃
  
  〃Nor did I say that!〃
  
  〃Then I have not understood you; Lazarus。 Conflict。〃
  
  The old man brooded; then answered slowly and sadly; 〃I think I said that marriage between a long…lived and a shortlived was a bad idea 。 。 and so it is 。 。 and I learned it the hard way。 But that was long ago and far away and when she died; part of me died。 I stopped wanting to live forever。〃 He stopped。
  
  The puter said brokenly; 〃Lazarus…Lazarus; my beloved friend! I am sorry!〃
  
  Lazarus Long sat up straight and said briskly; 〃No; dear。 Don't be sorry for me。 No regrets…never any regrets。 Nor would I change it if I could。 Even if I had a time machine and could go back and change one cusp…I would not do so。 No; not one instant; much less that cusp。 Now let's speak of something else。〃
  
  〃Whatever you wish; dear friend。〃
  
  〃All right。 You keep ing back to me and Llita; Minerva; and seem bothered that I denied her this 'boon。' But you don't know that I denied her anything and you certainly don't know that it was a 'boon。' Can be; surely…but not always; and often sex is not。 Trouble is that you don't understand 'Eros;' dear; because you can't; you aren't built to understand it。 I'm not running down sex; sex is swell; sex is wonderful。 But if you put a holy aura around it…and that is what you are doing…sex stops being fun and starts being neurotic。
  
  〃Stipulating for argument that I 'denied Llita this boon;' it surely did not leave her sex starved。 At worst I could possibly have miffed her a little。 But she was not deprived。 Llita was a hearty wench; and having to work too hard was the only thing that ever kept her off her back…or on top; or standing?up; or kneeling; or swinging from the chandeliers…and I did make it possible for them to have more time for it。 Joe and Llita were simple souls; uninhibited and uncorrupted; and of the four major interests of mankind…war; money; politics; and sex…they were interested only in sex and money。 With some guidance from me they got plenty of both。
  
  〃Shucks; it can't matter now to say that; after they learned contraception techniques…almost as perfect then as now; and which I taught them but had no reason to mention…they had no superstitions or taboos to keep them from branching out for fun; and their pair…bonding was so strong as not to be endangered thereby。 They were innocent hedonists; and if Llita failed to trip one tired old spaceman; she did trip plenty of others。 And so did Joe。 They had fun…plus the deep happiness of as perfect a marriage as I have ever observed。〃
  
  〃I am most pleased to hear it;〃 Minerva answered。 〃Very well; Lazarus; I withdraw my questions and refrain from speculations about Mrs。 Long and that 'tired old spaceman'…even though your statements show that you were neither tired; nor old; nor a spaceman at that time。 You mentioned 'four major interests of mankind'…but did not include science and art。〃
  
  〃I didn't leave them out through forgetting them; Minerva。 Science and art are occupations of a very small minority…a small percentage even of those people who claim to be scientists or artists。 But you know that; you were simply changing the aubject。〃
  
  〃Was I; Lazarus?〃
  
  〃Pig whistle; dear。 You know the parable of the Little Mermaid。 Are you prepared to pay the price she paid? You can; you know。〃 He added; 〃Don't pretend you don't know what I mean。〃
  
  The puter sighed。 〃I think the question is 'may;' not 'can。' A wheelbarrow has no rights。 Nor do I。〃
  
  〃You're dodging; dear。 'Rights' is a fictional abstraction。 No one has 'rights;' neither machines nor flesh…and…blood。 Persons…both sorts!…have opportunities; not rights; which they use; or do not use。 All you have going for you is that you are the strong…right arm of the boss of this pla 。 。 plus the friendship of an old man who enjoys very special privileges for a most illogical reason but does not hesitate to take advantage of those privileges 。 。 plus; stored in your~memories in Dora's number…two hold; all the biological and geic data of Secundu Howard Clinic…best such library in the Galaxy; possibly; and certainly best for human biology。 But what I asked was: Will you pay the price? Having your mental processes slowed down at least a million to one; data storage reduced by some unknown…but large…factor; some chance…again I can't say…of failure in achieving transmigration 。 。 and always the certainty of death as the ultimate oute…death a machine need never know。 You know that you can outlive the human race。 Immortal。〃
  
  〃I would not choose to outlive my makers; Lazarus。〃
  
  〃So? You say that tonight; dear…but would you say it a trillion years from now? Minerva; my beloved friend…my only friend with whom I can be truthful…I feel certain that you have been toying with this idea ever since the Clinic's files were made part of your memories。 But; even with your speed of thought; I suspect that you do not have the experience… the flesh…and…blood experience…with which to think it through。 If you choose to risk this; you cannot be both machine and flesh…and…blood。 Oh; certainly we have mixes…machines with human brains; and flesh…and…blood bodies controlled by puters。 But what you want is 

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